Trust Building | De-escalation Deep Dive

📜

NYPD Policy Reference

Patrol Guide PG 221-01: Use of Force Guidelines

De-escalation and Crisis Intervention: Officers should use trust-building techniques including making verbal commitments, demonstrating consistency between words and actions, and acknowledging the person's fears when possible. Building trust is essential in crisis situations where subjects may fear for their safety.

Communication Standards: Officers should establish credibility through honoring stated commitments, providing repeated reassurances, and referencing the history of positive interactions during the encounter to reinforce established trust.

✅

Best Practice Examples

Best Practice

Making Direct Promises

Kent Edwards Incident | Officer Librizzi | 2:44-3:30

Analysis

"I don't know how many times I can tell you that or how many different times I can tell you that we're not gonna kill you, alright? I promise Ishmael, we're not gonna kill you."

Officer directly addresses the subject's core fear with an explicit, personal promise. The use of the subject's name combined with a direct commitment ("I promise") creates a personal accountability that builds trust. The officer acknowledges how many times he's made this commitment, demonstrating patience and persistence.

Best Practice

Referencing Established Relationship

Kent Edwards Incident | Officer Brower | 1:48-2:20

Analysis

"Come on now. We've been talking for how long? I explained everything to you earlier."

Officer builds on previously established rapport by referencing their ongoing communication. This reminds the subject of the relationship they've built during the encounter and the officer's track record of honesty. It positions the officer as someone who has been consistent and transparent throughout the interaction.

Best Practice

Demonstrating Shared Risk

Kent Edwards Incident | Officer Messia | 3:00-3:35

Analysis

"No it's not, because if it blows you up it's gonna blow us up too. No one's gonna blow you up. No one's gonna, you know, shoot you. We don't want to hurt you, alright?"

Officer builds trust by explaining the mutual vulnerability - if the robot were dangerous to the subject, it would be dangerous to officers too. This logic-based trust building appeals to rational thinking and demonstrates that officer safety depends on subject safety. The multiple reassurances reinforce the message through repetition.

⚠

Needs Improvement

Repeated Commands Without Rapport

King Wong Incident | Officer Acosta | 1:06-1:45

Analysis

"Put the knife down! Put the knife down! Put the knife down! Put the knife down!"

The officer issues repeated commands without any trust-building elements. There's no attempt to understand the subject's perspective, no promises about safety, and no explanation of what will happen if they comply. The repetitive commands without variation don't give the subject any reason to trust the outcome.

Needs Improvement

Demands Without Reassurance

Emil Williams Incident | Officer Wright | 1:03-1:22

Analysis

"Put down the gun right now! Put down the fucking gun! Are you kidding me? Put down the gun!"

The officer's frustration undermines trust building. Expressions like "Are you kidding me?" communicate judgment rather than understanding. There's no attempt to promise safety after compliance or explain what will happen next. The subject has no reason to believe that compliance will lead to a positive outcome.

Needs Improvement

High-Intensity Without Connection

King Wong Incident | Officer Lamonica | 1:56-2:25

Analysis

"Get on the fucking ground right now! Get on the fucking ground! Put the fucking knife down!"

While the situation may require urgent commands, there's no accompanying trust-building language. A subject in crisis who fears harm from police has no reason to believe compliance will ensure safety. The absence of any promise or reassurance leaves the subject without motivation to trust the officers' intentions.

🔄

How to Improve

Instead of

"Put the knife down! Put the knife down! Put the knife down!"

Try

"I promise you're not going to get hurt if you put the knife down. I give you my word - put it down and we're going to talk, that's all. Nobody wants to hurt you here."

Instead of

"Stop moving! Don't move! Get down now!"

Try

"I've been honest with you this whole time, right? I'm asking you to trust me one more time - stop moving and I'll make sure you're treated fairly. You have my word."

Instead of

"Show me your hands! Hands where I can see them!"

Try

"I want to help you, but I need to see your hands first. Show me your hands, and I promise I'll listen to what you have to say. We're going to work through this together."

💡

Key Takeaways

🤝

Make Personal Promises

Use phrases like "I promise," "I give you my word," and "I'm telling you" to create personal accountability and demonstrate commitment.

🕑

Reference Your History

Remind subjects of what you've already been through together. "We've been talking for X minutes" shows you've invested time in them.

🔒

Address Core Fears

Identify what the subject is most afraid of and directly promise it won't happen. Fear of being killed needs direct reassurance.

📈

Demonstrate Consistency

Trust comes from predictability. Keep your tone, demeanor, and messaging consistent so the subject knows what to expect.

⚖

Show Shared Stakes

When applicable, explain how your safety depends on their safety. Mutual vulnerability builds trust through shared interest.

💬

Use Their Name

Saying someone's name while making a promise personalizes the commitment and makes it harder to break. It shows you see them as a person.

🗨

Discussion Questions

What specific promises can officers make during a crisis that are both meaningful and realistic to keep?
How do you balance the urgency of a dangerous situation with the time needed to build trust?
In the best practice examples, the officer had been talking with the subject for over two hours. How does extended engagement change the trust dynamic?
What happens to community trust when promises made during crisis encounters aren't kept after the crisis ends?
How can officers rebuild trust with subjects who have had negative prior experiences with law enforcement?